I always find this time of baseball season the most mind-numbingly stupid. It's when all the sports pundits won't shut the fuck up about how some players are clutch and others just can't get it done in the playoffs. It's when all the fans get to act like their team is the center of the universe, and we see the idiots make asses of themselves.
I think that there is really no better example of this than with the Tampa Bay Rays. The Rays are good. Really good. Baseball Prospectus predicted this, stat heads knew this, and your average ESPN pundit didn't realize it. So they kept saying stupid shit about the Rays - they're scrappy, this has been a magical season, etc. That's a load of shit. The Rays are a fantastic collection of talent, and they'll keep being good for many more years. They've developed the best farm system in baseball, and they've ensured that the AL East will probably be the toughest division in baseball.
Now, the AL East didn't used to be good. Hank Steinbrenner thinks it was, but the AL East was just the Yankees for about eight years. Then the Red Sox got good, so now there were two good teams. Now the Rays are a powerhouse, and the Blue Jays are getting better every year. Only the O's continue to suck outright.
While the bullshit surprise about the Rays and Hank Steinbrenner's crybaby shit is hilarious, what's even better is listening to Red Sox fans. Yankees fans are just pissed that they didn't make the playoffs.
But Sox fans are pissed that this new team is challenging them. They're pissed that a team that can't sell out it's ballpark during the regular season is making it.
Here's the thing: we really shouldn't expect there to be a large fanbase for the Rays. They spent years sucking. And the old ownership didn't give a shit about fielding a good team or caring for fans.
Look, the Red Sox have had a lack of postseason success over the years. But they've also been a pretty good franchise. They've fielded winning teams for many years. They're a century-old franchise that hase developed many lifelong fans. Lifelong Rays fans are in Junior High School right now. And that's alright - twenty years from now, there will be many lifelong Rays fans. They'll sell out whatever new ballpark they build. Good teams do that.
There was a time when the Astrodome had awful attendance. It was the pre-1997 years, when the team hadn't made the postseason since Nolan Ryan was pitching. Ownership sucked most of those years, until Drayton bought the team.
But a decade of postseason appearances and a lack of pro football in Houston made the city a baseball town. The Astros don't sell out every night, but they do fairly well considering how awful the teams have been since 2006.
It will be the same with the Rays. They'll do well, build a fanbase, and sell out stadiums later. Right now, though, it's kind of no-win situation for Rays fans. If they don't go to games, they're bad fans. But if they do go, then they're bandwagon fans. I suppose they can take solace in being a better team than Boston, though.
--------------------------------
I'm watching the ALCS right now, and it occurs to me that Boston is roughly as white right now as the 2005 Astros. Remember that? I remember taking shit for that on the internet - the only minorities were Zeke Astacio and Willy T. A big deal was made about the fact that Houston didn't have any black players. All Boston has is Coco Crisp. Whatever.
Friday, October 10, 2008
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Christ, I hate Joe Buck.
And Tim McCarver. Right now, I'm watching their NLCS broadcast. And they won't shut the fuck up about how terrible Manny Ramirez is as a person. How he acted like a dick in Boston. How he shoved that traveling secretary in Houston.
Look, I know that this is the conventional wisdom about Ramirez. But it's a load of crap. He's got the same problem that Carlos Beltran has - he makes everything look too easy. He's like the geeky kid in your calculus class who finishes the test half an hour before everyone else - you hate that he does it so much better than you could hope to. But the fact is that while that kid (and Manny and Beltran) is blessed with great natural gifts, he also works pretty fucking hard.
From everything I've heard about the guy, Manny Ramirez is one of the toughest workers in baseball. He spends hours of extra time in the batting cages. He works on his hitting technique and approach like few others. The man didn't get where his is by just coasting.
Now, I hear all the dipshits amongst you talking about how Ramirez was dogging it in his last month in Boston. That's a load of bullshit. The guy hit .347 with an OBP of .473 in his final month with the Red Sox. Manny was traded because Epstein had it in for him, not because he was throwing games.
And, yeah, he shoved that guy. We all have bad days. That doesn't excuse it, but it does mean that we should forgive it if the victim has forgiven Manny.
And I hear that he's kind of a dick. He doesn't like to sign autographs, and he frequently doesn't show up to charity events and such. Well, that really shouldn't be expected of him. He's a private individual, and he can do whatever the hell he wants with his time. Just because he's an athlete doesn't mean he has to conform to our desires or image of what a sports figure should be. It's great if our sports stars are like Berkman, Biggio or Sampson. But they don't have to be.
So lay off of the guy. He does his job, and that's really all that should be expected of him. He's one of the greatest right handed hitters of all time, so I don't really give a shit if he doesn't hustle on easy ground outs.
Look, I know that this is the conventional wisdom about Ramirez. But it's a load of crap. He's got the same problem that Carlos Beltran has - he makes everything look too easy. He's like the geeky kid in your calculus class who finishes the test half an hour before everyone else - you hate that he does it so much better than you could hope to. But the fact is that while that kid (and Manny and Beltran) is blessed with great natural gifts, he also works pretty fucking hard.
From everything I've heard about the guy, Manny Ramirez is one of the toughest workers in baseball. He spends hours of extra time in the batting cages. He works on his hitting technique and approach like few others. The man didn't get where his is by just coasting.
Now, I hear all the dipshits amongst you talking about how Ramirez was dogging it in his last month in Boston. That's a load of bullshit. The guy hit .347 with an OBP of .473 in his final month with the Red Sox. Manny was traded because Epstein had it in for him, not because he was throwing games.
And, yeah, he shoved that guy. We all have bad days. That doesn't excuse it, but it does mean that we should forgive it if the victim has forgiven Manny.
And I hear that he's kind of a dick. He doesn't like to sign autographs, and he frequently doesn't show up to charity events and such. Well, that really shouldn't be expected of him. He's a private individual, and he can do whatever the hell he wants with his time. Just because he's an athlete doesn't mean he has to conform to our desires or image of what a sports figure should be. It's great if our sports stars are like Berkman, Biggio or Sampson. But they don't have to be.
So lay off of the guy. He does his job, and that's really all that should be expected of him. He's one of the greatest right handed hitters of all time, so I don't really give a shit if he doesn't hustle on easy ground outs.
Shalom, everybody!
It's Yom Kippur! And since Tulane has a roughly 30-40% Jewish student body, we get the day off. Doesn't help me much, since I only have one class on Thursdays, anyways, but it's a nice gesture, even if I am Catholic.
So the Astros started making cuts. My favorite comment from the Astros website on this is from "Tranquillado": "That's a shame about Borkowski. Oh, wait, no it's not." I chuckled pretty hard at that one.
I suppose they're making room for FA's and draft protection. However, Drayton's said they probably won't go after the big-name FA's this season. I don't know how I feel about that. As I've said before, it seems like Drayton and Wade are half-assing the whole thing. They need to either pick the "spend a lot of money and get free agents" route or the "rebuild the farm and get good later" route. I favor the latter, but they have most of our big pieces locked up. Lee, Oswalt, and Berkman all have no-trades. Tejada is untradeable. Only Valverde and Wigginton might command something special. So you might as well go after free agents this winter. Whatever.
In other news, Jason Castro apparently led the HWL with a .438 BA in his first week. He now is 5th. Still, that's pretty good. He's only walked three times (2 BB, 1 IBB), but he's doing well. He only has two doubles, however.
The Astros took a lot of shit for drafting Castro. I know that I would have preferred Smoak. But I think that Wade was really drafting for signability, allowing him to spend later (as with Seaton). And Castro had done fairly well in low-A. He's not hitting for the kind of power that one would like, but he's walking about 11% of the time and can add power. And there's really nothing wrong with a guy who just hits for average and has a good OBP. It's, sadly, kind of a lost art. Ichiro is commonly thought of as that type of player, but (unlike Tony Gwynn, for instance) he hardly ever walks. We're looking for more of a Wade Boggs type player.
So if Castro turns into that type of player, that's fine. Hitting for average and the occasional double or homer while still walking makes you a great player. And it's the kind of player that really helps out teams, especially when you've got sluggers behind you.
I guess that's the bright side of the Astros not signing anybody significant. We at least won't lose any draft picks. And maybe Wade can really build a good farm system.
So the Astros started making cuts. My favorite comment from the Astros website on this is from "Tranquillado": "That's a shame about Borkowski. Oh, wait, no it's not." I chuckled pretty hard at that one.
I suppose they're making room for FA's and draft protection. However, Drayton's said they probably won't go after the big-name FA's this season. I don't know how I feel about that. As I've said before, it seems like Drayton and Wade are half-assing the whole thing. They need to either pick the "spend a lot of money and get free agents" route or the "rebuild the farm and get good later" route. I favor the latter, but they have most of our big pieces locked up. Lee, Oswalt, and Berkman all have no-trades. Tejada is untradeable. Only Valverde and Wigginton might command something special. So you might as well go after free agents this winter. Whatever.
In other news, Jason Castro apparently led the HWL with a .438 BA in his first week. He now is 5th. Still, that's pretty good. He's only walked three times (2 BB, 1 IBB), but he's doing well. He only has two doubles, however.
The Astros took a lot of shit for drafting Castro. I know that I would have preferred Smoak. But I think that Wade was really drafting for signability, allowing him to spend later (as with Seaton). And Castro had done fairly well in low-A. He's not hitting for the kind of power that one would like, but he's walking about 11% of the time and can add power. And there's really nothing wrong with a guy who just hits for average and has a good OBP. It's, sadly, kind of a lost art. Ichiro is commonly thought of as that type of player, but (unlike Tony Gwynn, for instance) he hardly ever walks. We're looking for more of a Wade Boggs type player.
So if Castro turns into that type of player, that's fine. Hitting for average and the occasional double or homer while still walking makes you a great player. And it's the kind of player that really helps out teams, especially when you've got sluggers behind you.
I guess that's the bright side of the Astros not signing anybody significant. We at least won't lose any draft picks. And maybe Wade can really build a good farm system.
Monday, October 6, 2008
This is pretty cool.
This little ESPN page has a list of MLB players' walk-up music. My favorite is Tejada's choice (I hope it's his choice anyways, and not some cruel joke by the MMPUS staff) of Toby Keith's "(I Ain't) As Good As I Once Was." Somebody told me that this was his new walk-up music around late July, and I really couldn't believe it. Remarkably self-effacing.
Kazuo Matsui's song is some DDR song. Stereotypical, but somewhat surprising.
Berkman's choices are an interesting mix of the expected and surprising. What you might expect: Ted Nugent and some Christian rock song. Not really surprising: Godsmack, Motley Crue. WTF?: Nickelback's "Animals." Christ, I hate Nickelback. As I once said to a friend, they lack poise.
I really think that Carlos Lee should have a mariachi band play his entrances. That would be sweet.
Kazuo Matsui's song is some DDR song. Stereotypical, but somewhat surprising.
Berkman's choices are an interesting mix of the expected and surprising. What you might expect: Ted Nugent and some Christian rock song. Not really surprising: Godsmack, Motley Crue. WTF?: Nickelback's "Animals." Christ, I hate Nickelback. As I once said to a friend, they lack poise.
I really think that Carlos Lee should have a mariachi band play his entrances. That would be sweet.
Sunday, October 5, 2008
Remember your roots
The inestimable Tom Kirkendall points out that this loss was up there with the worst in Houston sports history. And he kindly lists those other epic chokes.
He links to a story about John Elway's 98 yard drive to stop Houston from reaching the AFC championship game. I was too young (and in Baltimore) to remember that one. And I certainly didn't realize that our own Gary Kubiak was the holder on the Broncos' game-winning kick. Damn.
Never forget, folks, that Houston has a long history of choking, largely unrecognized by the outside world. It's a proud history. It wouldn't be Choke City without those events.
He links to a story about John Elway's 98 yard drive to stop Houston from reaching the AFC championship game. I was too young (and in Baltimore) to remember that one. And I certainly didn't realize that our own Gary Kubiak was the holder on the Broncos' game-winning kick. Damn.
Never forget, folks, that Houston has a long history of choking, largely unrecognized by the outside world. It's a proud history. It wouldn't be Choke City without those events.
Choke City proves it once again
Jesus. That was just fucking awful. I commented to my roommate that, with about five minutes left in the game and up seventeen points, the Texans were probably not going to lose this one. But they found a way, goddamn it, because that's their job.
I think everything that needs to be said about the game has been said. Rosenfels almost got a spectacular win, but then he cost us the game. Three consecutive turnovers. Fuck. So instead, I'd like to write about some of the comments I've seen. Most of these will be from the Chronicle website, primarily because that site brings out the idiot brigade.
Everyone wants to blame Sage, but he is the reason they were up. His deciveness with the offense and command of the huddle. He is to blame for not covering up the football, but the coaching should get a serious look for this collapse.
No, Sage was not responsible for the lead. That was play calling, Slaton, Daniels, and Andre Johnson, with a healthy dose of a resurgent defense. Go back and look at Sage's TD pass to AJ. That was almost a pick, and if Johnson weren't such a monster, it would have been going the other way. He threw into triple or quadruple coverage several times. Those were awful decisions, and he was only saved by the Colts' failure and the receivers' brilliance. Carr could have taken us to that point.
And he is definitely responsible for every bit of that collapse. HE tried the ridiculous leap-over-the-defense-for-the-1st-down play. HE couldn't protect the football. HE threw the interception to end the game.
With that said, the DC should still be fired. Our defensive playcalling sucks.
UUUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHHHHH! What a heartbreaker! Why wouldn't Kubiak pull Sage after the second turnover!? I could see his deer-in-the-headlights look on a low-definition TV!
Because (1) Schaub had a bad case of the shits, and (2) Owen Daniels is our third back-up. To be fair, though, I think Owen Daniels as QB would be pretty cool for a few plays. Just snap the ball to him and play him like a FB.
First:
All of you saying you are through with the Texans - PLEASE live up to your word and get the heck out!! You're are not needed or wanted in the fan base.
Listen, man. It's understandable to hate this fucking team right now. It's been almost seven years of losing (or not-winning!) football. We have yet to get a playoff appearance. Yet to post a winning season. Yet to do anything.
And I really don't blame Houstonians and the rest of Southeast Texas if they don't want to watch this team lose week after week. It fucking sucks. And we see the two teams we hate most - Dallas and the Titans - planning for playoff appearances. Meanwhile, we pray for a winning season.
So I understand if someone doesn't want to keep watching and hoping. That's fine. And if we start doing well, I hope they come back. I don't want them to leave permanently. At this point, it's not as if anyone watching is a bandwagon fan. It's not like they're the Astros or Rockets - teams that have failed to do anything after years of awesomeness. They're the fucking Texans. They wouldn't be jumping off the bandwagon, because there is no bandwagon to speak of.
I think everything that needs to be said about the game has been said. Rosenfels almost got a spectacular win, but then he cost us the game. Three consecutive turnovers. Fuck. So instead, I'd like to write about some of the comments I've seen. Most of these will be from the Chronicle website, primarily because that site brings out the idiot brigade.
Everyone wants to blame Sage, but he is the reason they were up. His deciveness with the offense and command of the huddle. He is to blame for not covering up the football, but the coaching should get a serious look for this collapse.
No, Sage was not responsible for the lead. That was play calling, Slaton, Daniels, and Andre Johnson, with a healthy dose of a resurgent defense. Go back and look at Sage's TD pass to AJ. That was almost a pick, and if Johnson weren't such a monster, it would have been going the other way. He threw into triple or quadruple coverage several times. Those were awful decisions, and he was only saved by the Colts' failure and the receivers' brilliance. Carr could have taken us to that point.
And he is definitely responsible for every bit of that collapse. HE tried the ridiculous leap-over-the-defense-for-the-1st-down play. HE couldn't protect the football. HE threw the interception to end the game.
With that said, the DC should still be fired. Our defensive playcalling sucks.
UUUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHHHHH! What a heartbreaker! Why wouldn't Kubiak pull Sage after the second turnover!? I could see his deer-in-the-headlights look on a low-definition TV!
Because (1) Schaub had a bad case of the shits, and (2) Owen Daniels is our third back-up. To be fair, though, I think Owen Daniels as QB would be pretty cool for a few plays. Just snap the ball to him and play him like a FB.
First:
All of you saying you are through with the Texans - PLEASE live up to your word and get the heck out!! You're are not needed or wanted in the fan base.
Listen, man. It's understandable to hate this fucking team right now. It's been almost seven years of losing (or not-winning!) football. We have yet to get a playoff appearance. Yet to post a winning season. Yet to do anything.
And I really don't blame Houstonians and the rest of Southeast Texas if they don't want to watch this team lose week after week. It fucking sucks. And we see the two teams we hate most - Dallas and the Titans - planning for playoff appearances. Meanwhile, we pray for a winning season.
So I understand if someone doesn't want to keep watching and hoping. That's fine. And if we start doing well, I hope they come back. I don't want them to leave permanently. At this point, it's not as if anyone watching is a bandwagon fan. It's not like they're the Astros or Rockets - teams that have failed to do anything after years of awesomeness. They're the fucking Texans. They wouldn't be jumping off the bandwagon, because there is no bandwagon to speak of.
The Texans Oilered it. This is not how you grow or maintain a fan [base].
Go Texans! Beat dallas!
See, that's the appropriate response. They choked. That's why we're Choke City (I particularly like the "Oilered it" comment). I mean, it sucked to watch them blow this. It was a real kick in the gut. But I couldn't help but chuckle at the damn thing. It was fucking comical. They just totally fucked up, and that's what we've come to expect. It would be weird (pleasant, but weird) if they didn't blow it.
So I'll still watch next week. I'll watch them until I die or they move. They're Houston's team, and so they're my team. I want them to kick ass next week, but I'm willing to wait until they do. It's getting harder year by year, though.
EDIT:
This collapse has inspired a new title card. Unfortunately, I can't find a photo of Rosenfels' Jim Brown style move, so I'll just use this photo of his later fumble.
So, was this a worse collapse than The Comeback? Probably. Granted, the Buffalo incident came with a hall-of-fame QB at the helm and the playoffs on the line, but that was also the result of Buffalo just playing like beasts.
While Rosenfels imitated Moon's fumble, Rosenfels absolutely choked on this one. No credit can really be given to the Colts offense. This one is squarely of Rosenfels.
Eat shit, Cubsfans (part 2)
hahahahahahahahahaha
oh jesus
hahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahaha
oh, fuck
hahahahahahaha
Dem Bums pulled off the finest upset since the Super Bowl. Wonderful.
I don't believe in luck or karma, but if there is such a thing, then I think the Cubs lost all of it with the Milwaukee Astros series. Right then, I knew that the Cubs just wouldn't win if God is just (and He cares about baseball, which I'm sure He does). He surely wouldn't reward a fan base that boos hurricane victims.
Of course, He also lets the Yankees win, but I figure that was just to test us.
Fuck the Cubs, that was fucking awesome.
oh jesus
hahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahaha
oh, fuck
hahahahahahaha
Dem Bums pulled off the finest upset since the Super Bowl. Wonderful.
I don't believe in luck or karma, but if there is such a thing, then I think the Cubs lost all of it with the Milwaukee Astros series. Right then, I knew that the Cubs just wouldn't win if God is just (and He cares about baseball, which I'm sure He does). He surely wouldn't reward a fan base that boos hurricane victims.
Of course, He also lets the Yankees win, but I figure that was just to test us.
Fuck the Cubs, that was fucking awesome.
Saturday, October 4, 2008
We're probably going to lose tomorrow...
and that's alright. I mean, it's not like 0-4 is a big hole or anything. It's not like we were all hopeful that this year - yes this very year - might be the year the Texans finally post a winning record. I didn't really buy the "we're going to make the playoffs" talk - we don't have a secondary or running game to speak of - but I still maintained hope that the Texans might make it out of the league's "laughing stock" category for once.
This team's got significant problems, and the last four weeks have only cemented that judgment in my mind. You can list the good defensive players on one hand - Mario, DeMeco, Okoye (though he's in a slump), and that's pretty much it. Everyone else is awful. This is particularly disturbing, since the front office has spent most of their top draft picks on the defense.
The offense is better this year. The receiver corps has improved, and Schaub (if he doesn't fuck up) will probably prove himself to be worth the investment. And Steve Slaton has been one of the few happy surprises for the Texans (most in our history have been of the "Surprise! Your #1 pick sucks!" variety).
But you look at where the Texans are as a franchise, and you're seeing a team that has been killed, time and again, by poor luck and poorer decision making. And I think that goes all the way back to Mittens.
The thing with Carr, I think, was that he could have been a good QB. As noted by so many over the years, he has good fundamentals, but he was just never developed. I think that the Texans really should have brought in a veteran free-agent in their first few years, giving Carr time to learn as a back up behind someone who knew what he was doing. I have no idea who was available in 2002, but that's not the point. The bar was set pretty low - they could just grab a journeyman backup for all it mattered. Just somebody who was competant. I don't know if that would have given Carr time to develop - it's entirely likely that he'd still develop into the terrible QB we all loathe - but it seems like that would have been a better strategy.
I don't know what to say about the Texans, otherwise. They're fucked. Maybe they'll tank the season and we'll get the Andre Johnson of safeties in the draft.
This team's got significant problems, and the last four weeks have only cemented that judgment in my mind. You can list the good defensive players on one hand - Mario, DeMeco, Okoye (though he's in a slump), and that's pretty much it. Everyone else is awful. This is particularly disturbing, since the front office has spent most of their top draft picks on the defense.
The offense is better this year. The receiver corps has improved, and Schaub (if he doesn't fuck up) will probably prove himself to be worth the investment. And Steve Slaton has been one of the few happy surprises for the Texans (most in our history have been of the "Surprise! Your #1 pick sucks!" variety).
But you look at where the Texans are as a franchise, and you're seeing a team that has been killed, time and again, by poor luck and poorer decision making. And I think that goes all the way back to Mittens.
The thing with Carr, I think, was that he could have been a good QB. As noted by so many over the years, he has good fundamentals, but he was just never developed. I think that the Texans really should have brought in a veteran free-agent in their first few years, giving Carr time to learn as a back up behind someone who knew what he was doing. I have no idea who was available in 2002, but that's not the point. The bar was set pretty low - they could just grab a journeyman backup for all it mattered. Just somebody who was competant. I don't know if that would have given Carr time to develop - it's entirely likely that he'd still develop into the terrible QB we all loathe - but it seems like that would have been a better strategy.
I don't know what to say about the Texans, otherwise. They're fucked. Maybe they'll tank the season and we'll get the Andre Johnson of safeties in the draft.
This is a recipe for disaster
MSNBC.com's page on the financial crisis is called "Gut Check America." Yes, that's exactly what we need. Not reasoned debate or a careful study of what's wrong - we need a fucking gut check. What does your gut tell you about the financial crises? What's that, gut? You think it was the Jews? Thank you, gut, for telling me about the traitors in our midst. Now all we need is some sort of final solution.
Thursday, October 2, 2008
What the hell is everyone so upset about?
So Jerry Jones apparently made some sort of statement about something:
"The Cowboys have never been about checkered tablecloths and boots and hats," Jones says. "They've been about glitz and glitter. Leave the other stuff to the Houston Texans."
You know, he's right. And it's an accurate description of the difference between Dallas and Houston.
Dallas is a city of hicks with money. More money than they know what to do with, in fact. And, thus, they spend their money as you'd expect a bunch of hicks with money to spend - rented BMW's, crappy "designer" shit, etc. And the Jerry Dome.
Houston is more working class. The "checkered tablecloths and boots and hats" and all that crap are a reflection of our nature. It's better than being a bunch of fake assholes. We're a city of working people - rednecks, immigrants, and executives. It's a great place.
But here's the kicker: we're more sophisticated than they are. All the things that makes a city "sophisticated" - the arts, universities, museums, etc. - better in Houston than they are in Dallas. We have a better symphony, opera, art museums, all that crap. Our universities are clearly superior - Rice beats SMU (no fucking shit), and Cougar High is a legitimate institution and the superior of UNT. We're just better with how we spend our money.
So the old claim that Dallas was somehow more "cultured" is false, too. So, if you're scoring at home, points go to Houston for culture, diversity, economy, politics, baseball, basketball, football players who aren't rapists, and history. Oh, and soccer. Dallas gets points for hockey (who cares?) and football teams made up of felons.
Seriously, thank you Jerry. Thank you for pointing out that Houston is better than Dallas. Texans didn't really need reminding of that fact, but all those Yankees might need to be updated on the situation (as it has stood for the last thirty years).
Oh, and fuck Dallas for just reinforcing the typical Texas stereotype. Go to fucking hell, you stupid assholes. Fuck Dallas.
"The Cowboys have never been about checkered tablecloths and boots and hats," Jones says. "They've been about glitz and glitter. Leave the other stuff to the Houston Texans."
You know, he's right. And it's an accurate description of the difference between Dallas and Houston.
Dallas is a city of hicks with money. More money than they know what to do with, in fact. And, thus, they spend their money as you'd expect a bunch of hicks with money to spend - rented BMW's, crappy "designer" shit, etc. And the Jerry Dome.
Houston is more working class. The "checkered tablecloths and boots and hats" and all that crap are a reflection of our nature. It's better than being a bunch of fake assholes. We're a city of working people - rednecks, immigrants, and executives. It's a great place.
But here's the kicker: we're more sophisticated than they are. All the things that makes a city "sophisticated" - the arts, universities, museums, etc. - better in Houston than they are in Dallas. We have a better symphony, opera, art museums, all that crap. Our universities are clearly superior - Rice beats SMU (no fucking shit), and Cougar High is a legitimate institution and the superior of UNT. We're just better with how we spend our money.
So the old claim that Dallas was somehow more "cultured" is false, too. So, if you're scoring at home, points go to Houston for culture, diversity, economy, politics, baseball, basketball, football players who aren't rapists, and history. Oh, and soccer. Dallas gets points for hockey (who cares?) and football teams made up of felons.
Seriously, thank you Jerry. Thank you for pointing out that Houston is better than Dallas. Texans didn't really need reminding of that fact, but all those Yankees might need to be updated on the situation (as it has stood for the last thirty years).
Oh, and fuck Dallas for just reinforcing the typical Texas stereotype. Go to fucking hell, you stupid assholes. Fuck Dallas.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
This is ridiculous
MVP voting is always a fucking crap shoot, but that this guy will fill out a ballot for the damn thing is a travesty. I mean, Sabathia and Ramirez are #1 and #2? They played for half a season!
Now, I've made my points about Berkman's candidacy before. I think he deserves the award. And if not him, then Pujols does. And if not him, it's Hanley Ramirez.
But read Heyman's line on Berkman:
Now, I've made my points about Berkman's candidacy before. I think he deserves the award. And if not him, then Pujols does. And if not him, it's Hanley Ramirez.
But read Heyman's line on Berkman:
10. Lance Berkman, Astros. Houston was just a little too late to the party.
What? They mounted a fantastic run at the playoffs (incidently, however, this had little to do with Berkman, and more to do with Lee and Wigginton)! They finished ahead of Pujols and the Cardinals! What the hell do you want from him? He was clutch, he was fucking Mr. Automatic, and he was just awesome. Without Berkman, the Astros don't have a winning season, let alone a playoff run.
And Ryan Howard? He sucked the whole year! He got good just as the season ended, and that's it. Utley deserves it more than Howard.
And Francisco Rodriguez for the AL MVP? That's just idiotic. The man is an excellent reliever, but he had nowhere near the value that Maeur, Sizemore, Youkilis, etc. had to their teams.
Fuck, people are stupid.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Economic Meltdown
It's funny, but people seem to like to work in hyperbole. This is apparent in any discussion about dictatorships (Pinoche suddenly becomes Hitler, Castro becomes Stalin), but it's also present in the sciences. Particularly those of the "social" variety.
The best example right now is in the discussion of the financial crisis. To hear politicians, both Democrats and Republicans, speak of this, it would seem that we are heading for a second Great Depression. In fact, that is essentially what has been said. Ben Bernanke, Paulson, and the rest of the government's economists have not only failed to diffuse this notion, they have (as best I can tell) aided in its diffusion.
This is a ridiculous idea. The "fail-safe" mechanism of the American (and world) economy - the Federal Reserve and Treasury - is still intact. Individual banks may fail, but the government can always issue more money. That will come at great cost, but at a much lesser one than either the "natural" result or the plan that so recently failed in Congress. And, really, we're looking at a fairly large but not massive loss of capital investment - a trillion dollars in a sea of some forty trillion. At the end of the financial day, the market will - somehow - reach equilibrium. If anything, we might just see a revitalization of American jobs as the dollar falls and foreign capital flows into the American system.
I think the main failure here has been in the American political system. Both sides have attempted to blame the other: Democrats blaming some vague failure of the "Bush economic policy," while Republicans conjuring up the "liberal government" bogeyman.
The Republicans are clearly engaging in little more than flinging bullshit, but the Democrats appear to be articulating a real critique. The problem is that the Democratic economic platform is not significantly different from that of the Republicans. The Bush Republicans, in fact, are advocating the exact same policy that the Democrats are supporting (albeit with a great deal of wailing and finger pointing). Both want a massive government bailout. The Democrats are just complaining about it more.
Really, what could have been done about the housing bubble? What would the Democrats have done differently in 2002 or 2003 to slow the boom? Their current critique stems from some abstract idea of a failure of the regulatory system - specifically the repeal of the Glass-Steagall act - but this idea is clearly a no-go.
Even if the Democrats want to say that the mortgage industry should have been more regulated, what could have been done? Would they have repealed the subsidy on mortgages? Would they have ordered the SEC or Fed to examine every mortgage issued? No, they would not have. Neither party wants to do anything different on this point. In fact, I think that if the Democrats had been in control in 2002, they would have simply taken credit for the boom, just as the Republicans did, and then pointed their fingers at the opposing party today - just as the Republicans are doing now.
And both sides do seem to be in consensus - banks should not be rewarded for their failures. But this desire for punishment seems to be related entirely to CEO and executive pay. This is absolute horseshit - a base appeal to populism that does absolutely fucking nothing. Yes, these men and women created this crisis. But so did home buyers, investors, and Congress. And demanding cuts to CEO pay is a laughable punishment. What would be an adequate punishment? Don't bail them out. Let there be natural consequences. Let the banks declare bankruptcy and be reorganized and bought by other, larger, better run banks. Let the market take its course.
Yeah, people will lose money. And nobody will like the results, mid-correction. But that's life. And the result will probably be better.
The best example right now is in the discussion of the financial crisis. To hear politicians, both Democrats and Republicans, speak of this, it would seem that we are heading for a second Great Depression. In fact, that is essentially what has been said. Ben Bernanke, Paulson, and the rest of the government's economists have not only failed to diffuse this notion, they have (as best I can tell) aided in its diffusion.
This is a ridiculous idea. The "fail-safe" mechanism of the American (and world) economy - the Federal Reserve and Treasury - is still intact. Individual banks may fail, but the government can always issue more money. That will come at great cost, but at a much lesser one than either the "natural" result or the plan that so recently failed in Congress. And, really, we're looking at a fairly large but not massive loss of capital investment - a trillion dollars in a sea of some forty trillion. At the end of the financial day, the market will - somehow - reach equilibrium. If anything, we might just see a revitalization of American jobs as the dollar falls and foreign capital flows into the American system.
I think the main failure here has been in the American political system. Both sides have attempted to blame the other: Democrats blaming some vague failure of the "Bush economic policy," while Republicans conjuring up the "liberal government" bogeyman.
The Republicans are clearly engaging in little more than flinging bullshit, but the Democrats appear to be articulating a real critique. The problem is that the Democratic economic platform is not significantly different from that of the Republicans. The Bush Republicans, in fact, are advocating the exact same policy that the Democrats are supporting (albeit with a great deal of wailing and finger pointing). Both want a massive government bailout. The Democrats are just complaining about it more.
Really, what could have been done about the housing bubble? What would the Democrats have done differently in 2002 or 2003 to slow the boom? Their current critique stems from some abstract idea of a failure of the regulatory system - specifically the repeal of the Glass-Steagall act - but this idea is clearly a no-go.
Even if the Democrats want to say that the mortgage industry should have been more regulated, what could have been done? Would they have repealed the subsidy on mortgages? Would they have ordered the SEC or Fed to examine every mortgage issued? No, they would not have. Neither party wants to do anything different on this point. In fact, I think that if the Democrats had been in control in 2002, they would have simply taken credit for the boom, just as the Republicans did, and then pointed their fingers at the opposing party today - just as the Republicans are doing now.
And both sides do seem to be in consensus - banks should not be rewarded for their failures. But this desire for punishment seems to be related entirely to CEO and executive pay. This is absolute horseshit - a base appeal to populism that does absolutely fucking nothing. Yes, these men and women created this crisis. But so did home buyers, investors, and Congress. And demanding cuts to CEO pay is a laughable punishment. What would be an adequate punishment? Don't bail them out. Let there be natural consequences. Let the banks declare bankruptcy and be reorganized and bought by other, larger, better run banks. Let the market take its course.
Yeah, people will lose money. And nobody will like the results, mid-correction. But that's life. And the result will probably be better.
Monday, September 29, 2008
Playoff predictions and hopes
We'll see what happens in Minnesota tomorrow, but I don't really give a fuck what happens, anyways, so I'll go ahead and make my predictions.
The Dodgers will lose to the Cubs in five. Unless something epic happens, and then we will all laugh at Cubs fans and tell them to eat more shit, because it is becoming of them.
The Phillies will win over the Brewers. You can't win with only one good pitcher. I also imagine Lidge will give up one go-ahead homer in the series, which will cause everyone on ESPN to get a bad case "won't shut the fuck up."
The Phillies will win over the Cubs in the NLCS. Zambrano's arm is falling off.
The Rays will win over the Twins/White Sox. The Red Sox will lose to the Angels. The Angels will beat the Rays.
The Angels will beat the Phillies in the World Series, which will cause a truly epic riot in Philly. Awesome.
My "dream" playoff: Cubs lose to Dodgers, Phillies lose to Milwaukee. Milwaukee wins over LA. Rays lose to the Twins, Angels win over Boston. Anaheim loses to Twins. Twins win over Milwaukee. Why is this my favorite? Because I hate advertisers, and no one outside of Minnesota, Milwaukee, and those few absolute fans of baseball will watch that series. No one. And it will be sweet.
The Dodgers will lose to the Cubs in five. Unless something epic happens, and then we will all laugh at Cubs fans and tell them to eat more shit, because it is becoming of them.
The Phillies will win over the Brewers. You can't win with only one good pitcher. I also imagine Lidge will give up one go-ahead homer in the series, which will cause everyone on ESPN to get a bad case "won't shut the fuck up."
The Phillies will win over the Cubs in the NLCS. Zambrano's arm is falling off.
The Rays will win over the Twins/White Sox. The Red Sox will lose to the Angels. The Angels will beat the Rays.
The Angels will beat the Phillies in the World Series, which will cause a truly epic riot in Philly. Awesome.
My "dream" playoff: Cubs lose to Dodgers, Phillies lose to Milwaukee. Milwaukee wins over LA. Rays lose to the Twins, Angels win over Boston. Anaheim loses to Twins. Twins win over Milwaukee. Why is this my favorite? Because I hate advertisers, and no one outside of Minnesota, Milwaukee, and those few absolute fans of baseball will watch that series. No one. And it will be sweet.
Hilarity and Madden 2009
I got Madden '09 this week. A few things:
1) It seems to be fucking impossible to get a sack in this game. Any time I get within grabbin' distance of the opposing pansy, he gets a magical pass off to his chosen WR. Gets my blood a-boilin'.
2) Running is a bitch.
3) Goddamn, but the corners in this game are fast. Can't pass into any coverage at all, lest I get picked off.
4) I really love the Battle Red uniforms (sans the red pants, of course).
I played a franchise season as the Texans. I just simmed through the regular season. Amazingly, the Texans went 10-6, making a wild card berth. Won the wild card against the Chargers, then I took on the Colts. The AFC Championship was between the Texans and the Patriots, in what was a truly epic passing battle in the middle of a fucking thunderstorm. My opponents for the Super Bowl? The motherfucking Cowboys.
Haven't played that one yet. Promises to be pretty cool.
Here's the funny thing about the Madden simmed playoffs. The teams that made it to the quarter-finals:
AFC:
Texans (of course)
Colts
Patriots
Steelers
NFC (here's where it gets good):
Cowboys (fine)
49ers (huh?)
Saints (maybe, I guess)
Lions (wat?)
And they say that the NFC is the stronger conference. Yeah, right.
1) It seems to be fucking impossible to get a sack in this game. Any time I get within grabbin' distance of the opposing pansy, he gets a magical pass off to his chosen WR. Gets my blood a-boilin'.
2) Running is a bitch.
3) Goddamn, but the corners in this game are fast. Can't pass into any coverage at all, lest I get picked off.
4) I really love the Battle Red uniforms (sans the red pants, of course).
I played a franchise season as the Texans. I just simmed through the regular season. Amazingly, the Texans went 10-6, making a wild card berth. Won the wild card against the Chargers, then I took on the Colts. The AFC Championship was between the Texans and the Patriots, in what was a truly epic passing battle in the middle of a fucking thunderstorm. My opponents for the Super Bowl? The motherfucking Cowboys.
Haven't played that one yet. Promises to be pretty cool.
Here's the funny thing about the Madden simmed playoffs. The teams that made it to the quarter-finals:
AFC:
Texans (of course)
Colts
Patriots
Steelers
NFC (here's where it gets good):
Cowboys (fine)
49ers (huh?)
Saints (maybe, I guess)
Lions (wat?)
And they say that the NFC is the stronger conference. Yeah, right.
Rockets gonna be awesome this year
Not to tempt fate or nothin'.
What's that? T-Mac isn't 100%? AAAAAHHHH! AAAAHHH! WHAT THE FUCK WE GONNA DO NOW? AH SHIT WE'RE FUCKIN SCREWED!!!!!
Okay, Matt, calm down. Pull yourself together. It's not that bad, right? T-Mac said it isn't that bad, and who are you to question Tracy McGrady?
Actually, I'm sure he'll be fine. We'll be fine.
ClutchFans has a lot of good videos up from the Rockets' media day. Undoubtedly, the best are Artest's interviews. He comes off as a lot less crazy than you'd think.
What's that? T-Mac isn't 100%? AAAAAHHHH! AAAAHHH! WHAT THE FUCK WE GONNA DO NOW? AH SHIT WE'RE FUCKIN SCREWED!!!!!
Okay, Matt, calm down. Pull yourself together. It's not that bad, right? T-Mac said it isn't that bad, and who are you to question Tracy McGrady?
Actually, I'm sure he'll be fine. We'll be fine.
ClutchFans has a lot of good videos up from the Rockets' media day. Undoubtedly, the best are Artest's interviews. He comes off as a lot less crazy than you'd think.
Sunday, September 28, 2008
I can't believe people actually come to this blog
I don't link to anybody (and, conversely, am linked to by nobody). I list it only on the two or three profiles I have out there on the internet (Fark, facebook, SBN). Frankly, I'm surprised anybody comes across this damn thing.
So I find it really interesting that people do find this site. And, thanks to that little counter thing at the bottom of the page, I can see how many people come here, where their ISP is, and where they came from.
My favorite recent activity was some fellow in Merry Old England, who reached this site by way of AOL (I thought that was America On Line, and I thought it went out of business). He was searching for "Choke farm & invocation." I really have no idea what the hell that's about. But he found my post about the state of the Astros farm system. Looking at the little blerb that pops up in search listings for that post, I really wonder why he clicked on that. I like to think that maybe he saw my cool picture of Hunter Pence and Mark Loretta sliding into Luis Chavez and thought, "Gee, that Yank game sure seems like jolly good fun! I shall, from now on, endeavour to learn more about it, and I shall make these "Astros" of Grand Old Texas my favourite team!" Or maybe he saw my nonsensical ramblings and liberal use of the word "fuck" and decided that the British stereotypes of America are largely correct.
I even saw that some dude from Tulane was poking around here. It could have been me, but I've got some cookie that should prevent that sort of thing from happening.
I like this one from today: Some dude in Houston did a Google search for "the texans are fucking awful," which apparently lists Choke City as the top result. Again, I'd like to think my use of "fuck" helped out a bit. So he got my recent post about Gary Kubiak's inability to call time-out. I'd like to remind this visitor that, while today's loss was tragic and depressing, everything (except Kubiak's complete and total fucking blunder and the defense's inability in the 2nd half to tackle) was pretty good. Steve Slaton and Matt Schaub give reason for hope. And the Rockets' training camp starts this week (I think), so soon T-Mac, Yao, and the Tru Warier will take our minds off of the Texans' utter suckage, just as the Dream, Pigpen, and Bags took our minds off of the Oilers in the mid 1990's. Everything comes full circle.
So I find it really interesting that people do find this site. And, thanks to that little counter thing at the bottom of the page, I can see how many people come here, where their ISP is, and where they came from.
My favorite recent activity was some fellow in Merry Old England, who reached this site by way of AOL (I thought that was America On Line, and I thought it went out of business). He was searching for "Choke farm & invocation." I really have no idea what the hell that's about. But he found my post about the state of the Astros farm system. Looking at the little blerb that pops up in search listings for that post, I really wonder why he clicked on that. I like to think that maybe he saw my cool picture of Hunter Pence and Mark Loretta sliding into Luis Chavez and thought, "Gee, that Yank game sure seems like jolly good fun! I shall, from now on, endeavour to learn more about it, and I shall make these "Astros" of Grand Old Texas my favourite team!" Or maybe he saw my nonsensical ramblings and liberal use of the word "fuck" and decided that the British stereotypes of America are largely correct.
I even saw that some dude from Tulane was poking around here. It could have been me, but I've got some cookie that should prevent that sort of thing from happening.
I like this one from today: Some dude in Houston did a Google search for "the texans are fucking awful," which apparently lists Choke City as the top result. Again, I'd like to think my use of "fuck" helped out a bit. So he got my recent post about Gary Kubiak's inability to call time-out. I'd like to remind this visitor that, while today's loss was tragic and depressing, everything (except Kubiak's complete and total fucking blunder and the defense's inability in the 2nd half to tackle) was pretty good. Steve Slaton and Matt Schaub give reason for hope. And the Rockets' training camp starts this week (I think), so soon T-Mac, Yao, and the Tru Warier will take our minds off of the Texans' utter suckage, just as the Dream, Pigpen, and Bags took our minds off of the Oilers in the mid 1990's. Everything comes full circle.
Bill Simmons is a dumbass
I know, everyone understands that Bill Simmons is a "homer" and a fool. And I even agree with Deadspin's Leitch that sports reporters don't simply become impartial as soon as they take a job. But Bill Simmons is employed by the dominate national sports broadcaster to just spew homer-istic nonsense on a website and then call it "content."
From his newest bullshit:
Only cities with locals who can play hockey outside in the winter can have an NHL team. Look, I want to like the NHL again. It looks magnificent in HD, and really, that's all that matters in life. For the umpteenth straight year, I'm going to advocate a 22-team league: two 11-team conferences, one in Canada, one in America, only in cold-weather cities (no ifs, ands or buts). That will give us more rivalries, deeper teams and a higher quality of play.
See, the problem is that we all know that Simmons didn't start "liking" the NHL until last year, when the Bruins made the playoffs for the first time in whenever. Hell, he admitted to it back then. So why does it matter if Boston is in a cold-weather area? It apparently didn't matter to him before six months ago. It's not as if, three years ago, Simmons woke up one morning and thought, "Gee, I should go see a Bruins-Kings game. I know that my hometown team is probably going to lose, but I sure do fondly remember playing hockey as a child. Seeing my beloved Bruins will bring back those memories. Ahh, to youth..."
Frankly, I don't really give a shit about (aboot?) hockey. I've been to games, and they're fun and all, but I just don't care. Yeah, that's probably because I never played it as a kid (and I couldn't really skate with wheels, either), but I really never played baseball much (just the wiffle and soft varieties, really), and I still care about that. I probably wouldn't care about it if I hadn't grown up seeing the Astros, but there you have it. People care about what they've been exposed to. I'm sure there are plenty of people in Los Angeles, Tampa Bay, and Phoenix who really do care about hockey. They either lived somewhere where they played it as children or have seen it enough to give a shit.
In fact, I'm pretty sure plenty of people care about hockey in those cities. Why? Because I can look at the attendance figures to see what the fuck is going on. What do we see with those figures?
Well, the bottom five teams in home attendance are Florida (hot), New Jersey (cold), Chicago (cold), Washington (cold), and Columbus (cold). From what I understand of it, Chicago is also one of the oldest clubs in the NHL. But they're still only selling 82% of their seats.
Now, I'll admit that the devotion of fans in Carolina is likely much less than that of Toronto. And that's to be expected - Americans just aren't into hockey as much as Canadians. But would Simmons say that New England cares about the Bruins as much as they care about the Red Sox? Fuck no.
I've seen similar arguments with other sports. The most brazen (I think) was one on Fark arguing for the contraction of the MLB to only the original franchises. What? Why would anyone want this? Baseball is undergoing a renaissance - stadiums are filled with fans and TV deals are more lucrative than ever before. And it's at least partly the work of the expansion.
More to the point, why do some cities deserve MLB (or NHL, NFL, NBA) teams, while others do not? Why would Minneapolis keep the Twins, while Houston would lose the Stros? Granted, it's tough to come up with cities whose "main" team is their expansion baseball team, but it's possible to find. Houston is probably the best example, though that is largely the product of the Oilers leaving town, the Astros going through roughly a decade of playoff baseball, and the Texans' continued suckage. The Oilers undoubtedly dominated Houston prior to about 1995, but, hey, shit changes.
The point is this: I get tired of this bullshit from a bunch of Yankees. I think it's our fault, too. If the expansion-era teams (whether in the NHL or MLB) didn't do so well, recently, then the older franchises' fans wouldn't get so pissed off. They long for the "Golden Age" when only teams from the East Cost dominated, and everyone from middle America could go fuck themselves. That's the truth of it - a sad nostalgia for a time these assholes never lived through.
And that's why Simmons didn't give a shit about the Bruins a year ago - they weren't winning and the weren't the Sox, so why should he care about them? Same with the Celtics. Same with the Patriots a decade ago. That's the fucking truth.
From his newest bullshit:
Only cities with locals who can play hockey outside in the winter can have an NHL team. Look, I want to like the NHL again. It looks magnificent in HD, and really, that's all that matters in life. For the umpteenth straight year, I'm going to advocate a 22-team league: two 11-team conferences, one in Canada, one in America, only in cold-weather cities (no ifs, ands or buts). That will give us more rivalries, deeper teams and a higher quality of play.
See, the problem is that we all know that Simmons didn't start "liking" the NHL until last year, when the Bruins made the playoffs for the first time in whenever. Hell, he admitted to it back then. So why does it matter if Boston is in a cold-weather area? It apparently didn't matter to him before six months ago. It's not as if, three years ago, Simmons woke up one morning and thought, "Gee, I should go see a Bruins-Kings game. I know that my hometown team is probably going to lose, but I sure do fondly remember playing hockey as a child. Seeing my beloved Bruins will bring back those memories. Ahh, to youth..."
Frankly, I don't really give a shit about (aboot?) hockey. I've been to games, and they're fun and all, but I just don't care. Yeah, that's probably because I never played it as a kid (and I couldn't really skate with wheels, either), but I really never played baseball much (just the wiffle and soft varieties, really), and I still care about that. I probably wouldn't care about it if I hadn't grown up seeing the Astros, but there you have it. People care about what they've been exposed to. I'm sure there are plenty of people in Los Angeles, Tampa Bay, and Phoenix who really do care about hockey. They either lived somewhere where they played it as children or have seen it enough to give a shit.
In fact, I'm pretty sure plenty of people care about hockey in those cities. Why? Because I can look at the attendance figures to see what the fuck is going on. What do we see with those figures?
Well, the bottom five teams in home attendance are Florida (hot), New Jersey (cold), Chicago (cold), Washington (cold), and Columbus (cold). From what I understand of it, Chicago is also one of the oldest clubs in the NHL. But they're still only selling 82% of their seats.
Now, I'll admit that the devotion of fans in Carolina is likely much less than that of Toronto. And that's to be expected - Americans just aren't into hockey as much as Canadians. But would Simmons say that New England cares about the Bruins as much as they care about the Red Sox? Fuck no.
I've seen similar arguments with other sports. The most brazen (I think) was one on Fark arguing for the contraction of the MLB to only the original franchises. What? Why would anyone want this? Baseball is undergoing a renaissance - stadiums are filled with fans and TV deals are more lucrative than ever before. And it's at least partly the work of the expansion.
More to the point, why do some cities deserve MLB (or NHL, NFL, NBA) teams, while others do not? Why would Minneapolis keep the Twins, while Houston would lose the Stros? Granted, it's tough to come up with cities whose "main" team is their expansion baseball team, but it's possible to find. Houston is probably the best example, though that is largely the product of the Oilers leaving town, the Astros going through roughly a decade of playoff baseball, and the Texans' continued suckage. The Oilers undoubtedly dominated Houston prior to about 1995, but, hey, shit changes.
The point is this: I get tired of this bullshit from a bunch of Yankees. I think it's our fault, too. If the expansion-era teams (whether in the NHL or MLB) didn't do so well, recently, then the older franchises' fans wouldn't get so pissed off. They long for the "Golden Age" when only teams from the East Cost dominated, and everyone from middle America could go fuck themselves. That's the truth of it - a sad nostalgia for a time these assholes never lived through.
And that's why Simmons didn't give a shit about the Bruins a year ago - they weren't winning and the weren't the Sox, so why should he care about them? Same with the Celtics. Same with the Patriots a decade ago. That's the fucking truth.
Kubiak should be fucking burned in effigy.
He fucking blew that game. Awful. Just fucking awful.
It's the first fucking quarter. The Jaguars DON'T SEND THEIR FUCKING PUNT TEAM ONTO THE FIELD YOU DUMB FUCKS, and Kubiak DOESN'T FUCKING CALL TIME FUCKING OUT WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU YOU DUMB MOTHERFUCKING ASSHOLE?!! So the Jaguars snap directly to their FB, who easily beats our punt return team WHO WERE ON THE FIELD BECAUSE KUBIAK IS THE DUMBEST MOTHERFUCKER EVER and gets the TD. And the defense just gave up in the second half, giving the Jaguars 17 points. Fucking tackle, for christsakes.
Scaub looked good. The receivers looked good. Slaton was wonderful. What the fuck more could you ask for? Oh yeah, a defense and a coach with a fucking brain. Fuck. The Texans tie it up to go to OT, but they lose the coin toss and the game. Fucking hell, I hate being a Houston fan.
Ausmus hit a two-run homer in his final game as a Good Guy. I wrote this song for him in honor of his service for the last decade. It goes to the tune of "Mandy."
Oh Bradley,
well you came and you hit like a girl,
but you played great defense,
oh Bradley
I like it a lot.
It's the first fucking quarter. The Jaguars DON'T SEND THEIR FUCKING PUNT TEAM ONTO THE FIELD YOU DUMB FUCKS, and Kubiak DOESN'T FUCKING CALL TIME FUCKING OUT WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU YOU DUMB MOTHERFUCKING ASSHOLE?!! So the Jaguars snap directly to their FB, who easily beats our punt return team WHO WERE ON THE FIELD BECAUSE KUBIAK IS THE DUMBEST MOTHERFUCKER EVER and gets the TD. And the defense just gave up in the second half, giving the Jaguars 17 points. Fucking tackle, for christsakes.
Scaub looked good. The receivers looked good. Slaton was wonderful. What the fuck more could you ask for? Oh yeah, a defense and a coach with a fucking brain. Fuck. The Texans tie it up to go to OT, but they lose the coin toss and the game. Fucking hell, I hate being a Houston fan.
Ausmus hit a two-run homer in his final game as a Good Guy. I wrote this song for him in honor of his service for the last decade. It goes to the tune of "Mandy."
Oh Bradley,
well you came and you hit like a girl,
but you played great defense,
oh Bradley
I like it a lot.
I'm beginning to think that maybe Backe doesn't want to pitch next year.
I didn't watch the game yesterday, and, from what I read, it was pretty brutal. Backe got it to 9-0 Braves in the 2nd before being pulled. Josh Anderson got two homers off of him.
Over the summer, I played MLB 2K8 (it was pretty awful; they really need to fix the graphics engine in that game, because everything would slow down for no reason). I had an Astros franchise where I actually won the World Series (I did a lot of trades and hired a lot of starting pitching). Throughout the season, I had Backe in the bullpen where he couldn't fuck too much up. At the end of the 2008 season, the game always had him retire. I think the game realizes something I didn't.
Backe is pretty fucking awful this year. He has given up way too many homers, walked too many, etc. Essentially, he's done all that he could to fuck up. Last night's game was an illustration of that.
I don't know if Backe will be back next year. He's just as hittable as Moehler (actually, he's slightly less hittable if you look at his K/9 rate), but at least Moehler doesn't walk hitters and usually keeps the ball in the yard.
Maybe Backe will be better next year. We can only hope, because the Astros don't have much else.
Over the summer, I played MLB 2K8 (it was pretty awful; they really need to fix the graphics engine in that game, because everything would slow down for no reason). I had an Astros franchise where I actually won the World Series (I did a lot of trades and hired a lot of starting pitching). Throughout the season, I had Backe in the bullpen where he couldn't fuck too much up. At the end of the 2008 season, the game always had him retire. I think the game realizes something I didn't.
Backe is pretty fucking awful this year. He has given up way too many homers, walked too many, etc. Essentially, he's done all that he could to fuck up. Last night's game was an illustration of that.
I don't know if Backe will be back next year. He's just as hittable as Moehler (actually, he's slightly less hittable if you look at his K/9 rate), but at least Moehler doesn't walk hitters and usually keeps the ball in the yard.
Maybe Backe will be better next year. We can only hope, because the Astros don't have much else.
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Michrochosm for the Season
In my commentary on the Astros' elimination from the wild card race, I didn't really comment on the game. It was pretty amazing.
Kazuo started off the night on a tear, and he led off with a double. Bourn laid down a bunt, reaching second on a throwing error while Kazuo scored.
Wigginton hit a homer to right field that was (for the second night in a row!) stolen by the right fielder. This time, however, Francouer was unable to get a hand on the ball, partially in thanks to a fan who grabbed the ball first. Interestingly, he had Wiggy sign his program before the game.
Bourn hit a double at one point. Tejada grounded out. Then Lance came to the plate. He slugged a deep shot into center field that would have been outta Wrigley or Cincinatti, but it was caught near the base of Tal's Hill. As soon as I saw it, I thought, "You know, Bourn might be able to score on this." Well, whaddya know? He sprinted rounded 3rd and slid home, but the throw wasn't really that close. It was a truly amazing display of speed from Bourn. As always with Michael Bourn, you just say, "If only he could get on base more often..."
But the Braves would bring the game within one when LaTroy Hawkins gave up his first earned run as an Astro. So the Astros went into the 9th with the score 4-3. Papa Grande came out, but game up the tying run. It was his first blown save in a while.
So Erstad came up with 1 out in the home 9th as a pinch hitter for Valverde. He swung at the first pitch, sending the ball into around the 6th or 7th row of seats in right field. Pretty sweet.
It really was a kind of michrochosm for the season. We gained ground early, lost it in the middle and at the very end, finally displaying a specatuaclar burst with time expiring. Unfortunately, it just wasn't enough to save the season.
It was a pretty fun ride, though.
Kazuo started off the night on a tear, and he led off with a double. Bourn laid down a bunt, reaching second on a throwing error while Kazuo scored.
Wigginton hit a homer to right field that was (for the second night in a row!) stolen by the right fielder. This time, however, Francouer was unable to get a hand on the ball, partially in thanks to a fan who grabbed the ball first. Interestingly, he had Wiggy sign his program before the game.
Bourn hit a double at one point. Tejada grounded out. Then Lance came to the plate. He slugged a deep shot into center field that would have been outta Wrigley or Cincinatti, but it was caught near the base of Tal's Hill. As soon as I saw it, I thought, "You know, Bourn might be able to score on this." Well, whaddya know? He sprinted rounded 3rd and slid home, but the throw wasn't really that close. It was a truly amazing display of speed from Bourn. As always with Michael Bourn, you just say, "If only he could get on base more often..."
But the Braves would bring the game within one when LaTroy Hawkins gave up his first earned run as an Astro. So the Astros went into the 9th with the score 4-3. Papa Grande came out, but game up the tying run. It was his first blown save in a while.
So Erstad came up with 1 out in the home 9th as a pinch hitter for Valverde. He swung at the first pitch, sending the ball into around the 6th or 7th row of seats in right field. Pretty sweet.
It really was a kind of michrochosm for the season. We gained ground early, lost it in the middle and at the very end, finally displaying a specatuaclar burst with time expiring. Unfortunately, it just wasn't enough to save the season.
It was a pretty fun ride, though.
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