Eat shit Cubsfans

I rarely scream at televisions. Particularly when I'm in a dorm. Tonight was an exception.

So I'm majorly pissed. Bud Selig made the Astros play a thousand fucking miles away from home after their home city is fucked over by the forces of nature.

I want to make something very clear right now. Fuck whatever it is that's in charge of baseball luck. I don't care if it's fate, or karma, or God himself. This is horseshit. And I'm fucking tired of it.

The city of fucking "Baaaaaaaaaaaastaaaaaan" gets to fucking market it's "loveable loser" bullshit for fucking forever. Chicago does the same shit. What the fuck kind of sympathy does Houston get? Fucking nothing. We've had two fucking national championships since the AFL merged with the NFL. If we want to go through the list of bullshit luck, we can (and we will).

1) Phi Slamma Jamma
Greatest college team ever gets fucked over by fate. Fuck fate.

2) Moon-Era Oilers
Greatest Oilers ever get fucking unlucky in the playoffs. Fuck luck. And Buffalo. And Dallas. Also lead to Adams moving the fucking team. Fuck him.

3) 1998 Astros
Been through this. Fuck it.

4) 2004 Astros
4 guaranteed HOF players on the roster: Bags, Bidge, Rocket, Kent. Four awesome (possible HOF, provided everything goes right) other players: Beltran, Lidge, Berkman, Oswalt. All get screwed in the playoffs. Fuck Jim Edmonds.

5) 1986 Astros
Goddamnit.

6) Rockets, since 1995.
Don't get me fucking started.

7) Texans
David fucking Carr. The entire offensive line. Fuck this.

8) Bud Adams
If I ever see his Jabba-the-Hut ass on the street, I'll kick it.

arrrgh

Being a Houston fan is tough. We see Dallas fans and their stupid fucking Cowboys win all the fucking time. We see the Mavericks start to fucking make it, and all those assholes in Dallas start becoming basketball fans. If the Rangers start to be good, you can be sure that all those fuckers will suddenly be baseball fans, too. Bunch of fair-weather fucks.

I've got sympathy for precisely three cities in the US: New Orleans, Buffalo, and Cleveland. Fuck everyone else.

Houston rocks, and we deserve better fucking results. We get screwed over by luck all the goddamn time. It doesn't help when the people in charge join in on the fun.

First, Ike kicks the city of Houston in the nuts. Power is out. Galveston is torn to fucking shreds. I imagine a good portion of Galveston bay, Brazoria county, and anything along the Bayous and channel is fucked to hell.

Then, baseball does us no fucking favors.

Fuck it. The Astros will kick ass tomorrow. Then the Rockets are going to feed the rest of the country a big pile of dog shit.